‘I pretended to be dead, and that is why I am still alive.’
Ms. Lolade John* sits quietly in front of her house in Idashen community in Owo Local Government Area of Ondo State. Her eyes are heavy as she looks far away in space, and reminisces about the event that almost led to her death at the hands of her husband.
Mrs John*, a tailor, was almost macheted to death by her husband, Mr Kolawole John, earlier in 2024, for allegedly leaking his secrets to others. According to her, she had earlier confronted her husband over the sexual harassment allegation made by her 14-year-old daughter, whom she had had for another before marrying her husband.
‘I married my husband and came into his house with my daughter; she is not his biological daughter, but he accepted her, or so I thought. Whenever I have a job, I used to go and do it at my sister’s house in a neighbouring community, and it just happened that the school was on holiday, and so I decided to spend more time in my sister’s house rather than rushing home.’
‘One day, my daughter called me with our neighbour’s phone, and I was surprised, and so I asked her why she did not use her stepfather’s phone. I forced her to speak to me, and that was when she said her father usually touched her private parts in my absence,’ she added.
She revealed that when she confronted her husband, he apologised for his attitude toward his stepdaughter and promised not to do it again. However, two days later, her husband tried to kill her to silence the matter.
“When I got home and confronted him, he apologised, saying it was the devil’s work. He asked me not to tell everyone, but I had already told my sister. I intended to leave him, but I wanted to do it slowly so that he would not get angry. Two days later, he came back from work abruptly, locked the door and macheted me, saying that I would not disgrace him.”
Ms John* said pretending to be dead during the ordeal may have just saved her because he left her, and she was able to run out of the house and call for help.
She said, “I tried to fight him off, but I was not as strong as a woman. He then picked a hammer meant for his job as a plumber and started hitting me on the head, saying he would kill me, and nobody would say anything. I was able to go to one of the doors and somersaulted outside and pretended to be dead, and that’s when he left me. He went back to the house and ran out later, and we have not seen him since then.”
She added that the cost of the ordeal has been high for her, as she needed about ₦4 million to repair the damage done to her head and hands.
“The hospital at first did not want to treat me, thinking it was an accident, but I told them that it was a domestic incident. The injury was too much, and I almost lost my left hand. It was flesh that was holding it together, and I needed surgery to take care of it, which cost me almost ₦4 million, and I am still not myself yet.”
But Mr John* has not been found since the ordeal, and the police have declared him missing. But Ms John’s family said his continued absence is delaying the dispensation of justice for the victim, who is yet to return to her normal self since the incident.
Ms. John* survived. But 64-year-old Ms. Mulikat Sanni was not so lucky.
In Ore, Odigbo Local Government Area, the elderly woman was allegedly raped and murdered in her home by her own grandson, Ahmed Toheed, a carpenter who accused her of witchcraft and blamed her for his misfortunes.
A family member who spoke on condition of anonymity said there was no inkling that Ahmed could commit such an offence.
‘I did not expect that he could do that to her. We are so shocked. But the police have arrested him, and we hope that the matter will be laid to rest soon. We are not happy at all,” the family member said.
The police have arraigned Toheed and charged him with rape and murder.
Their experiences, though different, have a connecting factor- Femicide.
The prevalence of Femicide in Nigeria
From domestic violence escalating into fatal assaults to the brutal murders of women at the hands of both partners and strangers, the growing prevalence of these incidents reveals a crisis rooted in cultural, societal and systemic failures.
The United Nations has revealed that every 10 minutes, a woman is killed. These statistics underscore a crisis of gender based violence. In Nigeria, femicide continues to be an issue that is frequently under-reported, dismissed and normalised.
In 2022 alone, about 400 women reportedly died as a result of sexual and gender based violence (SGBV). Data from the DOHS Femicide Dashboard shows that there were 135 femicide incidents resulting in 149 deaths in 2024, and as of April 2025, there have been 17 incidents and 19 deaths.
Legal experts warn of rising killings
A lawyer and gender-rights advocate, Blessing Olarewaju, described the situation as increasingly alarming.
“There are so many cases that have been reported. And there are so many others not even reported that we just get to know about one way or the other,” she said.
Olarewaju explained that Nigeria is not lacking in laws that protect women, especially when it comes to the fundamental right to life.
“There are so many laws that actually guide and protect the rights of women in Nigeria. Part of those laws is the 1999 Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. We also have the Violence Against Persons Prohibition Act of 2015, which was domesticated in Ondo State in 2021, and the Child Rights Act. Although these laws do not specifically mention femicide, when any law talks about protecting the right to life, it protects women against such crimes,” she noted.
Despite these legal frameworks, Olarewaju noted that systemic and cultural barriers often hinder the pursuit of justice. Families, she noted, sometimes attempt to withdraw cases, even when a life has been lost.
She emphasised that such interference should not determine the handling of cases.
“When an offence is perpetrated against any citizen of Nigeria, the offence is not just against that person but against the state. Despite family pressure or cultural norms, the state still intervenes in such cases and ensures that victims receive justice and perpetrators are held accountable. The long arms of the law will surely get to them, and that will serve as a deterrent to other prospective offenders,” she stressed.
Despite growing public frustration over delays in handling gender-based violence (GBV) and other criminal cases like femicide, legal experts say the slow pace of justice delivery is often the cost of ensuring fairness, due process, and thorough investigation.
An Assistant Director at the Ondo State Ministry of Justice, Mr Oluwasegun Akeredolu, explained that while citizens often equate delay with failure, the legal system is structured to prioritise accuracy over speed, especially in cases that carry severe penalties such as murder, rape, and armed robbery.
“Justice delayed is justice denied, but justice rushed is justice crushed. The law must balance the rights of victims with the constitutional protections of suspects,” he said.
He revealed that the constitution guarantees every accused person the right to be informed of the charges, have adequate time to prepare a defence, and be presumed innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt, adding that criminal cases are evidence-intensive and often hinge on multiple witnesses, forensic evidence, and complex legal arguments, which makes them far from straightforward.
“In murder or rape trials, you must prove that someone died, that the death was unlawful, that the accused intended it, and that he actually caused it; it’s not a tea party, especially when the outcome could be a death sentence,” he explained.
He described the Violence Against Persons Prohibition (VAPP) Law as one of the most effective legal frameworks introduced in Ondo State.
He said the law has simplified prosecution for GBV offences and offers better protection for victims, though its full impact depends on resources and consistent enforcement.
“The VAPP Law is one of the most brilliant innovations we’ve had. But like every law, it still operates within constitutional safeguards,” he said.
How effective is the VAPP law?
Head of the Human Rights Department of the Justice, Development and Peace Centre (JDPC), Catholic Diocese of Ondo, Mr Valentine Agabi, said while the VAPP law makes all forms of sexual and gender-based violence a crime, implementation remains weak because of deep-rooted social beliefs that normalise abuse.
“Society still looks at domestic violence and other forms of abuse as family matters that should be settled privately. The police often dismiss such reports, telling victims to go home and call family members. But every act of gender-based violence is a crime,” he said.
Agabi said the societal tendency to trivialise abuse, the reluctance of victims to pursue cases, and the economic realities that force many survivors to remain with their abusers are three major barriers that hinder access to justice.
“Victims themselves and family members sometimes fail to see that what is happening to them is a crime against their person. Many women are afraid of losing their homes or means of livelihood, and the stigma attached to being single or separated discourages them from going all the way,” he added.
He also noted that while the courts are duty-bound to try cases of gender-based violence, cultural pressures and victims’ fear often make prosecutions difficult to sustain.
To address these challenges, Agabi stated that the JDPC offers free legal aid and connects survivors with the Ondo State Agency Against Gender-Based Violence (OSAGBV), an institution established under the VAPP Law to provide legal, counselling, and rehabilitation services.
“We write petitions and connect victims to OSAGBV, where they can get counselling, testing, and legal follow-up. The idea is to make justice accessible and holistic,” he said.
OSAA-GBV
OSAA-GBV (Ondo State Agency Against Gender-Based Violence) is the key body in Ondo State, Nigeria, working to combat rising GBV through awareness, enforcing the VAPP Law (Violence Against Persons Prohibition), supporting survivors, and collaborating with partners to protect women, girls, children, and PWDs from abuse like domestic violence, sexual harassment, and harmful practices.
Ms Bolanle Afolabi, Executive Director, Ondo State Agency Against Gender Based Violence (OSAA-GBV), said the agency is actively working to prosecute families shielding perpetrators of Gender-Based Violence (GBV) in the state.
Afolabi said the agency would continue to implement policies to protect the rights of women and children and safeguard them against all forms of abuse in the state.
She said that families or anybody shielding perpetrators of GBV would be prosecuted for conspiracy against the law.
“To ensure grassroots stakeholders have good knowledge and understanding of the content of the Ondo State VAPP Law, we conducted community sensitisation across the 18 council areas of the state, so ignorance is not an excuse,” she added.
Police Vows Tougher Action against Gender-Based Violence in Ondo
The Ondo state police spokesperson, DSP Olayinka Ayanlade, who acknowledged the prevalence of violent crimes targeting women, said the command is tackling such crimes in Ondo state.
“There have been several cases, too many to recall at once, involving women being attacked or killed due to emotional attachments or domestic violence. But the command is doing everything possible to stem the tide of such crimes,” he said.
While reacting to public concerns about police indifference and hostility towards victims of domestic abuse, the police spokesperson said all gender desk offices across police divisions in the state are now female, in a bid to build trust.
“This narrative of indifference is historical. However, with female desk officers, victims can now communicate freely and openly during investigations. They are more willing to talk about what really happened,” he revealed.
Ayanlade further identified stigma, victim withdrawal and poor evidence preservation as major factors responsible for the low conviction of gender based violence cases.
When asked about the ongoing case concerning Mr John’s* disappearance, Ayanlade said the commissioner of police had ordered the tracking of the suspect’s phone amid other steps to ensure his arrest and prosecution.
He warned that ignoring early signs of abuse often leads to more serious crimes. While appealing to victims and their families not to lose faith in the justice system.
“Convictions depend on quick reporting and the willingness of victims to stand firm, regardless of stigma. When evidence is well preserved, the chances of justice are higher,” he added.
What must change?
The legal practitioner, Valentine Agabi, however, stressed that the passage of the VAPP law is only the beginning, as rebuilding public trust in law enforcement remains a crucial step toward justice.
“When victims go to the police and hear things like ‘Madam, carry this thing away, it’s a family issue,’ it kills trust. We all, including the government, police, NGOs need to work on changing attitudes. It will take time, but every small effort counts,” he disclosed.
Agabi called for consistent education and collaboration among civil society groups, security agencies, and community leaders to ensure that gender-based violence is treated as a serious crime and not a private affair.
“Ending violence against women is not a fight for the police or NGOs alone. It is a collective fight for equality and justice. We need to keep chipping at the problem until the system truly protects victims and punishes offenders,” he added.
Another legal practitioner, Blessing Olarewaju, urged women, families, and communities to respond to early signals of violence rather than waiting until harm becomes fatal.
“People should not even wait until it gets to the point of their lives being taken away before reporting. Once they notice any act or sign of violence, either from a spouse, family member, employer, or anywhere, they should take precautions and make sure they report as soon as they can,” she disclosed.
With femicide cases rising and public concern deepening, Olarewaju believes that timely reporting, firmer legal enforcement, and societal rejection of violence remain essential steps in protecting women’s lives across the country.
(*asterisked names not real names)
Editor’s Note: This report is in fulfilment of the Naija Feminists Media 2025 Editorial fellowship as part of its commitment to advancing gender equality in Nigeria.
