The Equality of a Woman is not Subject to Anyone

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Summary: This Piece highlights how women who debase themselves to fit patriarchal and religious expectations often silence their own suffering. Equality is a birthright, and submission that diminishes a woman ultimately leads to pain, shame, and regret.

Whenever a woman, especially one in the public eye, comes out to debase herself and elevate a man in a bid to fit into society’s and religion’s expectations of women, I usually pity her.

That is because, time and time again, it has been proven that for you to see yourself as below another human, you must bend to fit in. And when it comes to bending to fit in, it is only a matter of time before the bending becomes painful, unbearable, and regret sets in.

There are so many women in relationships and marriages that they are not happy with, marriages that bring them pain, that put tears in their eyes. But which mouth will they use to speak? The only available mouth has already sold itself cheaply, debased itself, so the shame of speaking out becomes far greater. They would rather endure the ache.

The equality of a woman, as of any other human being, is not subject to anyone or anything. It is a birthright. There is no king over your head except the one appointed over everyone by the government. You are not anybody’s neck; you are a complete human being, with head, neck, and all parts. We have different strengths: where I draw strength, a man may not, and where a man draws strength, I may not. This is why we are all equal in our own rights.

It is a mental condition for a woman to assume that her husband is greater than her. I saw one video where Eno Jerry Eze was saying, “No matter the degree you have, until you submit to a man” I said, Madam, gbe nu e soun. When did you even start submitting to Jerry?  The same you who used to break everything in the house? He has money now, so let’s not talk. I digress.

Religious folks with their hidden agenda will continue to drum into your ears: “Submit to your husband in everything. Husband is the head, next to God.” But I tell you, all that is nonsense. No matter the educational qualifications or achievements of the messenger, anyone who tells you that you are below another human needs therapy. Because no human was created to be beneath, belittled, or subject to another, we are all equal in the sight of God. Some of you even lose your greatness because you feel far less of yourself, and you settle.

So when you try to fit into society’s narrative, when you grow tired of fitting in, you will come out and start speaking in riddles like Peggy, posting “hide my ID” stories about someone’s husband doing XYZ. That is the reward of patriarchal princesses. You will be ashamed to even admit your suffering.

Do not take abuse from a man just because you want marriage, promising submission and offering him headship. Someone who cannot even lead his own trousers will be claiming to be king over your head. Until the load becomes too heavy, you will start looking for where to tell riddles.

As I type, another brainwashed Nigerian woman is preparing to exalt a man to kingship and debase herself as the “neck” that follows, a passenger while he plays captain. Until reality sets in, and then we start seeing riddles on the internet. If God keeps us alive, we will be here digesting those riddles

Editor’s Note: This article was first published on Facebook